Thanks for the well wishes. It was....nice. Flowers showed up at the door, dinner was delicious, we talked about our favorite memories from that day and from the honeymoon. All in all, it was what it should have been.
Though I do wonder, does anyone actually get that diamond anniversary band? Kidding! But come on, I like shiny pretty things as much as the next girl.
So did anyone see this in the NY Times? Happily (so she thinks) married woman's husband tells her he doesn't love her anymore and wants out and she.....ignores him. Gives him space. Lets him work it out until, 4 months later, he's back in the family fold (upon which there are lots of hard talks and working things out, it's not as simple as it appears). Fascinating. It's essentially the same advice in the various prevent divorce books (divorce busting, etc), and mirrors other advice I've received or read. And it, sort of, is the strategy that worked for me, too, except I was more in his face about it than is recommended.
I don't know how sustainable my marriage is over the long term. But the truth of the matter is no one really knows for sure, either. It is what it is, for now. I do know there is a deep and lasting scar, and I don't know if we'll transcend it. I don't think, right now, it's healed particularly well. But it is definitely still in the healing phase.
3 days ago