back and blue

Sorry, I know it's been a while. And of course a lot has been happening. New movement on the in-law front, new ideas with new counselor, new discussions with the husband, and a job interview. I've just been feeling blue about it all this week and too overwhelmed to post.

I did make some fudge, though, so that helped.

Let's start with the easy one, and I'll tantalize you by pledging the in-law update tomorrow. So, flew to Boston Sunday, for the interview on Monday. Weather in Boston was crappy, and traveling with a toddler who still naps presents a bit of a logistical challenge. Glad we made the trip - a change in scenery is always good to shake things up a bit. But we spent far too much time in the hotel. My daughter is a very funny, very verbal girl. As we walked around she kept saying when are we going to Boston? And we'd say we are in Boston. And she'd reply, no, this is my city. I guess all cities are the same to three year olds?

It was damp and muggy in Boston. And I've started to reach the stage of just being uncomfortable in my own stretched out skin. And hot. And sweaty. Throw in interview nerves and I just have this sinking feeling I was a hot, sweaty mess. I left wanting the job more than ever. It's part-time, 20 hours per week. But being pregnant is an issue. They frankly asked me about it in a way that crossed the "legal line," but hey, if I was hiring, I'd want to know too. I spent two hours yesterday writing customized thank you notes, addressing any missed points, to the 6 people with whom I interviewed. I'm really curious who else I'm up against. I'd be good at this job, but I come with one huge negative. What negatives do the other applicants bring? Essentially I'd be their on-site presence for a large number of their clients - clients I've worked with before. People I already know,though some I'd have to meet and establish relationships with. Part-time relationship building with an infant is doable. It would work. I used my line that I care about them and the issues and if I felt I couldn't do it, I have the personal integrity to withdraw my name from consideration. So, who knows.

They said they'd let me know next week. Fingers crossed.

It left me bummed out on Monday. Just blue about everything. And then seeing the national news left me feeling scared and worried. There is too much stress in my life. My counselor's take is that I need to focus on removing stress and getting through these next few months. Easier said than done. I don't even know what that would look like. I do know that nesting is starting to kick in - the clutter in our house is making my skin itch.

So - tomorrow - the in-laws! Stay tuned.