My aunt is still fighting. My brother and I are still not sure of what to do. Meanwhile, my sister, who lives 5 hours away from my aunt, drove there and back yesterday. She called on her way home, and when I asked how it was said, well, you know, it was ..... pretty terrible.
My aunt is conscious and aware. She's also in a lot of pain. She's swollen with tons of fluid (over 50 pounds, according to my unreliable narrator sister - is that possible?). She has a lot of sores - bedsores from being on her back since December, sores from infections. She's off most painkillers because they drastically depress her blood pressure. My sister says our two cousins have come to accept the inevitable. They want pain meds, and to make their mother as comfortable as possible. My uncle, and one doctor, are still fighting. My uncle says when this is over he will take my aunt on a cruise. I guess you could say my aunt is still fighting too, and as long as she is fighting, able and willing to tolerate the day by day, that is good, right?
My brother and I live close to each other. I just hung up with him. He said even our more distant cousins are calling and going. And he and I have not called, have not decided to go. It's an 11 hour drive. Flights aren't great - hard to get good flights to their destination, and then you'd have to do a rental car. He said he was thinking about driving Thursday,
staying Friday, driving back Saturday.
I am thinking about my husband, daughter and I driving next weekend, or maybe flying if something decent pops up. But it's not like I could - or should, or would want to - take my daughter to the hospital. I don't know. So frigging indecisive. Maybe if my brother and I did it together we could manage in two days - we're fairly decent travel companions, focused on the get there and efficient traveling.
I am watching Godspell on turner classic movies right now. I saw the play when I was in high school and loved it. This movie, not so much. Am I over the hippie phase? Is this the kind of thing that only works on impressionable teenagers? Wait a second, VIC.TOR GAR.BER is Jesus?? Wow. That 'fro is something. Vic.tor Gar.ber. I will never watch him chew scenery again without thinking of him in this sweet-faced role.
Anyway. Maybe my hormones have something to do with my indecisiveness. Except my brother is exactly the same. I had a blood draw on Friday - this time without the nurse blowing out my vein resulting in huge purple bruise. They called Friday afternoon. Beta is excellent, over 3400, and so I can schedule a sonogram. That will be a big step.
I keep thinking about sending something. Some sort of healthy food. Everyone is spending all their time at the hospital, even nights. Fruit, maybe. There's all sorts of candy and sweets that can be mail-ordered. What kind of healthy food? Any ideas?
5 days ago