Tuesday, October 23, 2007

starting out

I've wanted to start a blog for sometime, but have been too chicken/busy/unsure/scared - take your pick. But most importantly, I couldn't figure out a good name. A name says it all - who you are, what you have to say, why you're here. I had name anxiety. All the good names were taken, and anything I could think of wasn't good.

I was in a group counseling session talking about some recent troubles when I said, I just didn't know who I was anymore. I had been infertile, I had suffered a miscarriage, I had a healthy baby, I had a pregnancy go horribly wrong, I was suffering from secondary infertility (gee, wonder why I was in counseling?) - which box did I check to describe me? Where did I belong? And how could I uncheck some of the boxes and keep the ones I wanted (happy and healthy mom and wife, namely).

So that's it. That's me. Unsure of who I am and why I'm here. Not happy much of the time, struggling to figure out my place. Where do I belong? Where is my box to check?

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